Monica Bielanko
That's What She Said
Just A Junk Drawer Dream
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The Best 90 Seconds of Yesterday

My days go by in a whirl of busy non-activity. What I mean to say is I do a lot of stuff but I'm always sitting on my ever-expanding ass. Feeding Violet: sitting. Bathing Violet: sitting. Typing here: sitting. Driving to work: sitting. Working: sitting. Eating: sitting. Work meeting: sitting. Talking on the phone: sitting. Peeing: sitting. Driving home: sitting.

I can out-sit the shit out of you.

I'm always busy sitting. Busy sitting. Shouldn't that be an oxymoron? But it's not. Amidst all this sitting I've never been busier in my life. It's no way to live but, you know. You live every day like that and collapse into bed thinking, Thank god that's over! As if that one day was an anomaly, a derivation from your usual semi-charmed kind of life. But you've gotta do the whole damn drill again the next day. And the day after that. Pretty soon you've been doing that 'busy sitting' routine for the better part of two years.

Suddenly you realize you're the kind of person who looks forward to ten goddamn minutes alone in the bathroom. The kind of person who enjoys the drive home from work when the drive home used to be the frustrating part of your day you had to endure to get to where you really wanted to be. You say to yourself I just need ten goddamn minutes to myself!! and wonder when you turned into your mother.

But then you sit back (there you go sitting again), analyze your life and realize the best ninety seconds of yesterday, when you were sitting doing the same damn thing you did the day before, are better than just about any other ninety seconds of your life.

Reader Comments (11)

Found your blog from mamapundit - just wanted to say that as a working mother of a 1-1/2 year old and a newborn (currently on maternity leave) - I can totally relate to and love this post!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterElissa

Just like Elissa, I found you through Mamapundit. LOVE the blog and totally relate to all the busy sitting and wanting 10 minutes alone a day without someone trying to touch you. It's a nice problem to have, all this beautiful sticky motherhood business. Sweet, mandarin-orange-juice- covered and dimpled little hands wanting to pull your face closer to give you a big, wet kiss. LOVE LOVE LOVE. Way better and completely different than anything you could imagine in the life before this.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaty

I keep commenting on you and your husbands' are both probably thinking I went all stalker. I did. I "work" 70 hours a week in front of this damn computer. I own a business and really all I do is babysit the surveillance systems for both of our shops, and switch from both of your blogs trying to get caught up on the past couple years of your lives. I am just going to put it out there.
I would pay to read both of you guys' stories. I think you guys should go all "Misery" on eachothers asses and force eachother to write books, minus the whole ankle breaking scene, cuz that's just sick. But seriously, you should be getting paid for this stuff...I feel like a thief reading all of this and not paying. It's that good.

I will discontinue the commenting all the time. But I won't quit lurking, I am like an addict now, and I can't be stopped. just saying.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmber

I was having such a shitty day until I read your post and watched the video. Priceless. Thanks, Monica. And Violet!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMichele

Amber, that is such a nice thing to say. Don't quit commenting. How the hell will I know you're reading? I love hearing from people... it's what this whole damn thing is about.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Girl Who

She is the sweetest! She is starting to sport an afro.... and I am sooo jealous! When I was a young girl, I always wanted to have an afro, but all I got was the straight, stringy hair.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

I see that Serge was able to get the Dora juice cups for Bean that he has been admiring!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCandi

Oh, how I love the sanctuary of the bathroom...

September 3, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterchristine from canada

Aw...I just LOVE the way her finger hits that button. She's certainly got flair. You are a great mother cracking up in the background, telling her to slow's just...RICH.

Wow. That WAS a good 90 seconds. So I guess it's true: "Sitting can mean more than what it's doing to your but-tocks, Jen-nay".

It's a GREAT life you have over there, Monica and family! Thank you for sharing these ripe moments!


September 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGina

I like the way you call her "BEAN". A cute little jumping bean. Slow down and chew your nuggets, Bean. Reminds me of when my dad (who never really knew our names back then), used to call me 'Bean' ( Ginabean), which was okay until it morphed into 'Beav'. Not nice at all. The others got names like "Bongo, Gonzo, Gonce, Sconce, Lahbo," I know it was all in fun but still. Bonzo...sheesh.

Bean is good. :)

September 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGina

Beano...that was another one. Bean is good. :)

I love that little farm toy. Never heard anything like that from a child's toy.

September 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGina

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