Monica Bielanko
That's What She Said
Just A Junk Drawer Dream
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Just Who The Hell Is Santa Claus, Anyway?

Ever wondered just who the hell Santa Claus really is? I mean, we're letting this strange old man who has been stalking us all year long into our homes? At night, no less?

I got to researching who the "real" Santa Claus is and how this whole Christmas thing got started. It's fascinating. The American version of Santa Claus – and the world that surrounds him including Mrs. Claus, Rudolph and the North Pole – is a combination of a historical figure, many different legends, the work of American writers and illustrators and yes, the advertising creations of corporations.

Now, when your kids ask you questions about where Santa "really" lives and who he "really" is - you've got answers to every question. The history of Santa Claus in America. It's what I'm babbling about.

Oh! One more Santa Claus related item! Toddlers freaking out on Santa's lap. Except these ain't no ordinary Santas. Talk about freaky. I mean, what? Did these guys just get out of prison? Can you blame these kids for crying? Even I'm having nightmares.