Monica Bielanko
That's What She Said
Just A Junk Drawer Dream
You can also find Monica's writing here:
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Showering in my bathroom feels like I imagine trying to change your clothes in an airplane bathroom would feel. You keep dropping stuff but can't really even bend down to pick it up. You bump your head a few times, your ass hits things.

God, I hate my bathroom. We've rigged this little shower and curtain system onto the ancient claw foot tub but have yet to work out some sort of shelving system. Shaving my legs is now some kind of contortion routine that would certainly garner a gold medal in the Olympics of unsexiness. Ass sticking to shower curtain, cursing, soap dropping... All while legions of ladybugs march across the ceiling toward their imminent demise in the light fixture where I then get to view their sad crackly carcasses until I buck up and just clean the damn thing. Yes, ladybugs have taken over. But, as their name implies, they are very benign, ladylike creatures... and so - unlike their name - they don't bug me much. Not even their dead bodies.

It's my birthday today and yet after thirty-five years on this planet I'm not feeling very reflective. I don't have time to feel reflective, LUCKY YOU. Listening to somebody's nostalgic reflections is worse than watching another episode of The Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, I think. But I've floated off course. I have something to tell you! Something so magical and wonderful and mind-blowing that we still don't let ourselves believe in its occurrence even though we have seen it happening with our very own eyes.

They are rebuilding our house, you guys! It is under construction. I absolutely couldn't believe that it would be worth it for our landlords to rebuild a hundred year old home and yet it is. We walked through it last week and instead of feeling freaked out and creepy - like I thought it would feel - it felt like HOME.

Basically they are having to rewire and then rebuild the entire house. The second floor was burned and the first floor has a lot of water damage so walls and ceilings were torn down if they didn't burn down and then guys who apparently know what they're doing spent hours and hours drying things and now actual construction is underway. Even though it's basically the skeleton of a home every time I go there I don't want to leave.

Mid-June. That's the word. So if I can shower with the ladybugs for two or three more months I might just get to go home again... Jiggity-jig. Happy Birthday to me!

Reader Comments (29)

Oh, oh oh oh!! Who would have thought?! HAPPY DAY. Love to you Monica and all Bielankos! ... and pictures in progress, please.

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAlison

Very happy for you guys - you really deserve a little peace and happiness.

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterslange

How awesome! Hip hip hooray! That's wonderful news. I know you love that house, that town, that place. Will you gt to pick some of the finishes?

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

Happy happy birthday! That is wonderful news, I'm so happy for you all!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth B

That's amazing! I have also done the claw foot tub things. Wait to get pregnant until after you move. Otherwise you'll never get to shave your legs. Pregnancy and claw foot tubs do not mix!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHilary

Monica, I had one other thing. I have the worst time getting your site on my home computer, which is a Mac but I can get it easily on my work computer, a PC. Do you know why that is?

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHilary

Happiest of birthdays to you, doll. And congrats on the house! Amazing and wonderful news! WOOT!!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered Commentersweetney

Nice! I was hoping they would rebuild it (bionic -- better, stronger).

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStarsky

Yay! I am so very happy for you guys! I'm sure you're thrilled!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterD

Yes...way! A New and Improved version of the same you get your old memories, and MORE new ones to come! So it was not ALL FOR Naught! So this means that ol' Serge there was actually saved from having to ALL of the backbreaking renovations himself!!! Amazing amazing amazing. So Happy Snappy shave your legs in the old claw tub Birthday Monica! Best news I have heard all day. You can see the bigger picture here...the good that comes out of the crummy things that happen to us. Oh's a happy little song to go with this post!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergina

That is so very, very awesome! I know how beloved that HOME is to you!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermargaret

This is amazing news! Happy Birthday!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKami

You and your family deserve every AMAZING thing that comes your way!!! Happy Birthday :)

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

How cool is that? I am SO hoping that you will be back in that house where you guys were so happy! Your landlords must be saints! Happy birthday!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnn from St. Peter, MN

oh my, that's so cool news, I'm happy with you, happy birthday, cheers!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteranajo

That is wonderful news, Monica! I hope you will be able to give some input on decor!

And FYI for you and Hilary, I am a Mac person and don't have any trouble accessing your site.

Happy Birthday!!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKristin

Such wonderful news! My heart is filling with happiness for you guys. Happy Birthday!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSara

Now THAT'S a birthday present! Hope the time goes quickly for you and you're back where you belong in the blink of an eye.

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarole

I use a Mac and have difficulty accessing the site fairly often. Eventually it shows up though.

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarole

i am glad that you were born, otherwise who would enlighten humor and inspire me on the world wide web... you are the best. love your house news!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteralicia

How wonderful and what a fantastic birthday present! Happy, happy happy day!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJane

Happy Birthday! So, SO happy for you guys!!!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHanni

Wonderful News!
Have a Happy Birthday!
You deserve it!!!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered Commentershuga

That's awesome news! Happy Birthday!

March 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJanis

So happy for you! :D

March 28, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSerena from Italy

happy birthday- and the above post- the photo. You are a truly beautiful woman-I wish my 35 looked like that!

March 28, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermary cate

happy birthday!
happy for your excitement about the house - as much as i could also picture you and serge in non-bucolic (i.e. urban) surroundings and as much as i sometimes feel that our attachment to the past is part of our earthly demise.
oh, and almost forgot... as much as i don't appreciate when somebody states the obvious: you are absolutely beautiful - beyond the picture you posted... (for serge's benefit: this is an honest and non-threatening-whatsoever statement)...

March 28, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterfahrenheit

That is great news! It sounds like the timing couldn't be better. Also, you are aging beautifully. You look wonderful.

March 28, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKathi

YAY! What exciting news. Also? Some of us have been dreaming about having an ancient claw foot tub, and our husbands won't let us have one. Just know that there is at least one person who is jealous of your leg shaving contortionist act.

March 28, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterwindylou

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